Friday, September 4th 09

“To Say I Love You, Is To Completely Surrender Oneself”

Friday, September 4, 2009 
3:44 AM

I once wrote, awhile back that i feared that i would end up alone. As those close to me said, not likely or Chill Az. Of course yet again they were right. The feeling was passing, life seemed to be back on track. However the feeling of being alone still isn’t completely gone.

I recently just met up with a very old friend, one of my oldest and closest friends. Yes we dated, and yes she was my first love and i hers. However the relationship was short lived as i feared long distance and broke it of leaving it very much unfinished. Now as she is back in my life, i feel like iw as the person i was a long time ago, the person i tried to forget, for reasons even now i don’t remember. I’m smiling again. Been awhile, yes i was very much jealous and disappointed when Ms. A chose mr. M.S (for certain purposes i shall not mention their names). But as long as she is happy right? Life worked out somehow some way, in the weirdest way.

Some say, I’m always +1. Is that true? Am i always and have always been +1? It’s quite a upsetting thought, that i don’t have just Az. No +1 with that.

Random thoughts fill my head over and over again. Just had the busiest yet quite fun weekend with a few friends and sorting my little brother out. Finally that lil fuck has got his mind straightened out and in order. Let’s see how long this one lasts. A good friend said to me “No matter what happens, no matter how bad the situation gets, never give up, even when others do so, Don’t give up. He’s Blood man. “. Finally it feels like the storm is calming down, and the rays of sun are slowly breaking through the dark ominous clouds. Keep looking up, don’t let them get you down. Ah fuck its 4am, sahur time… Been having trouble sleeping lately.. no idea why. Will update again soon. Shiba! Just fucking remembered the review of mine has to be shortened to 300 -.- .. AHH Shiba!!